


to seeing the bright side

by catching_paper_moons



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Didn't Know They Were Dating, Light Angst, M/M, Pining, Sort Of, resident relationship expert dylan strome is on the case
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-06
Updated: 2018-03-06
Packaged: 2019-03-27 19:42:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13887816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/catching_paper_moons/pseuds/catching_paper_moons
Summary: “Anyway, I’m fucked, I think.”“You think?” Dylan asks, and Mat sighs. “No, I just mean, did you just figure out that you’re in love with Tito? Because I could’ve told you that years ago, dude.”





	to seeing the bright side

**Author's Note:**

> many thanks to the cheerleaders I had on this, mainly ellie, who is a gem. and ria, who is my number one fan <3 thanks for telling me I was okay when I thought I wasn't <3
> 
> this fic was born after tito's valentine's day instagram story of him and alan quine on a date, to which i responded "i can't believe he's doing that, right in front of mat's salad."
> 
> see the end notes for untagged warning! I hope you enjoy!!
> 
> Title from "Afterglow" by CHVRCHES.

Like many sad stories, this one starts when Mat gets drunk. Unlike many sad stories, Mat does not cry while he’s drunk, but he does have several realizations. One, he’s never seen Tito as happy as he is with Alan. Two, Tito is very beautiful. Three, he might be a little into Tito.

It’s not anything he can’t handle; it’s just that he’d been expecting to have a great night while out with the team, and maybe he’d a had a little too much vodka. So now he’s squished in a booth between Jordan and Seids watching Tito stare lovingly at Alan while Alan tells some story animatedly, and it’s not like Alan is...ugly, by any means. It’s just that, very objectively, Mat would say he, personally, is better looking. He doesn’t even know what any of this really means or why he’s thinking it. He texts all of this to Dylan Strome, live updates.

_I mean would you say Im ugly?_ he asks, finally.

_Yah_ , Dylan responds. Typical.

_K, fuck you_ , Mat says. Dylan responds with just a smiley emoji and Mat groans, setting his head down on the table. The table sort of hushes.

“Everything okay, Barzy?” Jordan asks, and Mat picks his head up, looking at everyone, sort of wide-eyed.

“Uh, yeah, sorry, just family stuff,” he lies. “Can I–” he starts to ask, and Seids gets up to let him get out. He climbs over people and heads outside to clear his head. His thumb hovers over a bunch of different people’s names until he just hits call. Dylan picks up almost immediately.

“Hello, this is your resident expert at relationships Dylan Strome, how may I help you?” Dylan says, almost without breathing. Mat rolls his eyes, laughing slightly.

“You are absolutely the furthest thing from an expert at relationships,” Mat says pointedly, and Dylan laughs. “Anyway, I’m fucked, I think.”

“You think?” Dylan asks, and Mat sighs. “No, I just mean, did you _just_ figure out that you’re in love with Tito? Because I could’ve told you that years ago, dude.”

“It’s...what?” Mat asks, confused. “I have not been in love with him for years. What are you even talking about. I just figured out I was into him. Dylan.”

Dylan sighs, and Mat leans against the outside of the bar, running a hand through his hair. He thinks back on his entire existence with Tito in it and gets a little lost in it when a hand touches his shoulder. He inhales sharply, and turns around to see Tito.

“Sorry,” Tito says quietly. It’s cool out, and the wind is making his cheeks pink. Mat looks at him and thinks that he would like to kiss Tito’s cheeks, make them even more pink. He has no fucking clue when this happened. “Didn’t realize you were on the phone.”

“S’okay,” Mat says, reaching for Tito’s hand. He squeezes gently. “I’ll be back in a second.” Tito smiles at him and walks back in. Mat hears him tell Jordan that everything’s fine. He sighs. “Dylan, I swear to _god_ I didn’t know until literally five minutes ago.”

“Mat _hew_ ,” Dylan says, and he says something to Nick Merkley on the other end.

“Dy _lan_ ,” Mat interrupts. “Tell Merks I say hi.”

“He says hi,” Dylan says without saying anything to Nick, blatantly lying. Mat sighs again. “Mat, buddy, you know feelings are–”

“Something I don’t want to deal with?” Mat says, and he hears Dylan sigh again. This conversation is chock full of sighing. It sucks.

“Feeling are okay to have. And it sucks that it’s for someone that’s already with someone. Trust me. I get it,” Dylan says, and Mat wonders if he’s talking about Davo or Marns. He can’t tell. He feels a little more sad than normal, and figures it’s gotta be the vodka.

“Maybe I should go home,” he wonders aloud, and Dylan hums. Mat plays with the hem of his jacket, and sighs. “Alright, so. I caught feelings. How do I get rid of them?”

Dylan snorts. “You don’t?”

“Ugh, Dylan,” Mat groans. He exhales loudly and rubs at his nose, suddenly feeling the fact that it’s only about 52 degrees outside. “I don’t want this. I don’t want it when I know I can’t have it.”

“Yeah,” Dylan says, and they’re quiet after that. No one ever said relationship experts could fix everything anyway.

  
  
  


So, life goes on, Mat pines over Tito for one hour a day (he’s scheduled it in), and he continues to play hockey, and it’s fine. He’s fine, or at least he will be, and then.

“Oh, by the way, Alan and I broke up,” Tito says, entirely too casual at lunch one day, and Mat chokes on his sandwich. Tito looks up, alarmed. “You okay?”

“You...what?” Mat says, trying to swallow the giant bite of his food he’d accidentally inhaled. He takes a sip of water and puts a hand over his heart.

“I...we broke up,” Tito says. His brows are furrowed. “Like, I sort of think it was a long time coming. It’s no big deal.”

“No big deal? You guys dated for like a year,” Mat points out, and Tito shrugs. Mat sees what’s going on; Tito’s deflecting. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really?” Tito says, shrugging again. “It just happened. Figured you should know.” Mat nods, not quite knowing what to say. He takes another bite of his sandwich. “So–”

“So like, are you okay?” Mat asks through a mouthful of turkey and mayo. Tito purses his lips like he’s trying not to laugh. Mat swallows and wipes at his mouth. “Sorry, I know I’m–”

“The worst,” Tito finishes, but he’s smiling, so Mat doesn’t take offense. “I’m...I think I will be. It’s still pretty fresh right now. And I don’t really want to see him. But I also don’t want to talk about it. Is that okay?”

And like, Mat’s always appreciated how candid Tito is with him. It’s a part of him that Mat has always really liked about Tito. He’s blunt but always kind. Mat wishes he could be like that. It’s just, like, when Tito is so refreshingly honest with him, it makes it difficult for Mat to be anything but that, and really, Tito deserves Mat’s honesty and goodness if Mat’s ever had any, so.

“Of course,” he says, and it’s soft. “I’m here if you need me.” Tito smiles at that, and they continue their lunch, breezing through like eighty different topics of conversation, and Mat looks for any cracks in Tito’s facade. He can’t find any, which means Tito probably isn’t super broken up about this. That’s good for Tito, because Tito deserves to be happy, so he always should be.

  


It’s not like Mat decides this has to happen, it’s just. Well.

He gets drunk, and Tito gets drunk, and they end up at Tito’s place, and suddenly Tito’s giving Mat the best blow job he’s ever gotten.

“Holy _shit_ ,” he moans, and Tito begins to pull back, but Mat shakes his head. “No, no, it’s good.” He can feel Tito smile and that’s almost enough to push him over the edge, but he stays as still as possible. Tito pulls off just before Mat comes, and some of it gets on Tito’s sheets.

“Oops,” Tito says, but he’s giggling, and it makes Mat laugh, and then they’re kissing, and Tito’s pushing Mat back on his bed, and Mat cannot believe this is happening. It’s like his dreams came true or something. That’s never happened before. (Unless you count being drafted, which he doesn’t, because he worked hard for that shit.)

Later, once they’ve showered and brushed their teeth, they’re laying in Tito’s bed, just curled around one another, watching a vine compilation, and Mat yawns.

“You tired?” Tito asks, running his fingers through Mat’s hair.

Mat yawns again, humming a little. “You gave me a workout, bud,” he says, and Tito laughs. “I’m serious.” He’s whining a little, but it’s a joke. Tito just laughs again.

“You should sleep, then, if you’re tired,” he says. Mat has an arm thrown around his waist, and he looks up at Tito. “I’ll be here when you wake up, you know.”

“I’d be concerned if you weren’t,” Mat says. “It is, after all, your bed.”

Tito laughs at that and sets his phone down, snuggling into the pillows more. “I’ll talk to you in the morning, Mat. ‘Night.” He turns away, and Mat has to take several deep breaths before he can even think about falling asleep.

When he wakes up, Tito is scrolling through something on his phone. He makes a sleepy noise of confusion, which causes Tito to turn his head and look at him. His smile is soft and it makes Mat’s stomach do a lot of backflips. It’s too damn early for that.

“Morning, sleepy,” Tito whispers. Mat makes another noise and frowns into one of Tito’s pillows, which makes Tito laugh. “I know, I know. Wanna get coffee?” Mat nods, and Tito pushes him out of his bed. Mat hits the ground butt first and groans.

“Ow, Tito, what the fuck,” he says, and Tito laughs harder.

“You haven’t called me Tito in a while,” Tito says, and Mat groans again. “But you’re awake now?”

“Yeah, I’m up,” Mat says, rolling his eyes. He stands up and blinks, looking down at the ground. Tito’s breath catches, and Mat looks over at him, almost fully awake this time. “What?”

“Nothing,” Tito says quickly, but Mat catches sight of himself in Tito’s mirror, and there’s bruises everywhere, but especially around his neck.

“Oh,” Mat says, running his hand over one of the marks on his collarbone. “I see.” He smiles in Tito’s direction, waggling his eyebrows, and Tito blushes a little. It makes Mat laugh. “Oh my god, please. We fucked last night, pretty sure this was just part of it, and now you’re gonna be embarrassed?”

“I’m not embarrassed,” Tito says, walking toward Mat, pulling his shirt on. He runs his fingers over one of the marks on the other side. “It’s just nice. I like it.”

“Good look for me, eh?” Mat says. The moment feels charged, and Mat feels like his feelings are showing completely, but Tito seems to take no notice, just smirks a little and nods. He doesn’t know what takes over him when he says, “Maybe you’ll have to do it again, then.”

Tito shrugs, though, and brushes a strand of Mat’s hair out of his face. It’s definitely a move, and Mat’s watched him make it on countless other people. He’s beginning to get why it works. “Maybe you’ll have to show me how,” he says, and all Mat can do is nod. “Come on, coffee?”

It takes every single spoon Mat has not to faint right then and there and actually follow Tito out of his apartment. He’s pretty proud of his resolve.

  
  


So it sort of becomes a thing. Mat and Tito will fuck, hook up, whatever you wanna call it, and then just hang out like they usually do. It’s not as weird as Mat expects it to be, considering his predicament, but sometimes his feelings catch him off guard. Like today, when Tito comes storming into the hotel room, door slamming behind him.

“Uh, hello?” Mat says, pulling an earbud out from the video he was watching. “You okay?”

“Why–” Tito kicks at the bed “–is it so fucking hard–” he kicks again “–to _talk_ to him?” He flops onto Mat’s bed next to him, and Mat stares at the wall for a full thirty seconds before taking a deep breath.

“Maybe because it fucking sucks to be exes with someone that you play with?” Mat offers, and Tito groans. He feels a little out of his wheelhouse, because usually he’s the one kicking and screaming, and Tito’s the one with the soft voice and calming words, but Mat’s got this. He’s a good friend, and he’s done this for other people, so. “Talk to me, bub.”

“No,” Tito says into the pillow. “I’m fine.”

“I feel like you’re not,” Mat says, and Tito turns his head a little to stare at him out of one eye. He holds his hands up in the surrender position. “Okay, fine, I’m not in your head, I don’t know.”

“Okay, listen,” Tito says, and Mat locks his phone and throws it far away. “Listen. I’m sad.” Tito pauses as if he’s going to keep speaking, but he just deflates.

“I know,” Mat says, and he squeezes Tito’s shoulder. “I’m here for you to rant at, if you want.”

“Can you just–” Tito cuts himself off, clearly frustrated, and Mat narrows his eyes. “No, don’t give me that look. It’s fine. It’s probably shitty of me to ask, anyway.”

“It’s not? Just say it, dude,” Mat says, and Tito rolls over, splayed out on the bed, eyes closed. It’s really a _look_ , and Mat has a lot of feelings about it that he can’t really articulate.

“Can you just fuck the feelings out of me?” he asks, and Mat raises an eyebrow. “Don’t judge me.”

“I’m not,” Mat promises. He lays on top of Tito which makes Tito huff out a laugh. “How’s this? Is this working?” He presses a kiss to Tito’s neck, and Tito squirms a little. Mat braces himself, sucking a bruise there, and then Tito turns away. “Okay, what’s up?”

“It’s not…” he huffs, and Mat pushes his hair out of his face, presses a kiss to Tito’s forehead. “I’m just. I’m mad, and frustrated, and–”

“Do you wanna listen to JB? Because I can give you a great karaoke performance,” Mat offers, and Tito laughs a little. “Or we can have sex, and _then_ do some JB karaoke. Either way it’s on the table and I’m so ready.”

“I hate that you said sex and JB karaoke in the same sentence, but I’m not gonna say no,” Tito replies, and Mat smiles, leaning in to kiss him. He’s definitely got this part down.

Mat cleans up, afterwards, and Tito’s lying there, staring at him, as he throws the condom wrappers away and throws the hand towel back in the bathroom. He walks out, shirtless, and feels Tito’s eyes on him. It makes him want to shiver. He doesn’t.

“What?” he asks, and Tito shrugs.

“You’re hot,” Tito says, and Mat feels his face flush. _Get a hold of yourself, Mat_. “Oh wow, you’re blushing, this is so cute.”

“Don’t even,” Mat says, scrolling through Spotify. “What kinda Biebs are we lookin’ for this afternoon? Old school? Newer stuff? I’m partial to _My World 2.0._ , personally.”

“I can’t believe you’re really going to do this,” Tito says. “Can I film it?”

“Absolutely not,” Mat says, but he’s smiling, and so is Tito, who is definitely pulling out his phone, so he won’t begrudge him this. He’ll let Tito have it. He shoots off a text to Dante before he starts singing along to “Somebody to Love.” Tito’s laugh is worth the embarrassing videos sent in the team group chat, though, so Mat can’t be too mad.

  
  


Mat is passed out on a plane ride somewhere (he honestly can’t remember, right now) when he’s shaken awake. He rolls over, rubbing at his eyes, and where Jordan was once sitting is now Tito, and he looks upset.

“Mmm, what’s up?” he asks, reaching out for him. “Sit down, you’re fine.”

“I didn’t realize you were actually asleep,” Tito says, curling into him when Mat makes room. Mat squeezes his shoulder. “I just...ended up in a weird conversation. I think I need lots of ice cream.”

“I’m sure we can find some when we land,” Mat says, and Tito smiles a little, closing his eyes as he leans his head on Mat’s shoulder. Mat wishes he could just lean down and kiss his forehead, but that’s kind of not just bros, probably. He shoots Dante a text.

_is it just bros to wanna kiss ur friend? asking for a teammate,_ he says.

_Literally no,_ Dante responds, and, well, there’s that.

_not even like...a peck to the cheek or something?_ he asks, and Dante just responds with an eye roll emoji, so Mat figures he’s exhausted that line of questioning, and texts Dylan.

_oh resident relationship expert, I am in need of your assistance,_ he says, regretting it almost immediately, because Dylan responds with:

_Hello!!!!!!! I am here for all your Tito Drama Needs hit me wit it._

_I hate you,_ Mat responds, and Dylan just sends back a smiley face, so he explains what’s going on, and how Dante was of absolutely no help, and it’s just like.

He knows it’s not just bros to want to kiss your teammate. That much is very clear. He also knows that a lot of what he’s feeling isn’t just bros. It’s very much that he’s into Tito, and really trying to hide it, and it’s not working. Tito shifts against him and Mat is suddenly hyper aware of every move he makes. He can’t bring himself to check his phone.

By the time they’ve landed, Mat thinks he’s taken about three breaths while trying not to jostle Tito, and he lets out a huge sigh once Tito has moved. Tito blinks, and Mat turns to face him.

“You good?” Tito asks.

“Sure,” Mat says, and they leave it at that.

Mat gets one pint of ice cream from the 7/11 down the block from their hotel. Tito starts to complain, but Mat points out that Tito never finishes the full thing, and he shuts up. Mat asks the front desk for plastic spoons, and they head up to their room. Tito flops on the bed almost immediately, and Mat snorts, throwing one of the spoons at him.

“Come on, come eat this ice cream with me,” he says, and Tito rolls over, sticking his tongue out. “Hey, you’re the one who said you wanted it!”

“I know,” Tito says, and he throws himself onto Mat’s bed, grabbing the pint. “Thank god you know I like chocolate.”

“Thank god you do, otherwise I wouldn’t know what to do with you,” Mat says back. They eat in relative silence, just scrolling through their phones. Tito sighs once, twice, and then a third time, and Mat looks up.

“It’s nothing,” Tito says.

Mat frowns. “Try me,” he says through a mouthful of ice cream, and Tito rolls onto his back. Mat nudges at him with his foot.

“I’m just. Frustrated,” Tito says, shoving his phone in Mat’s face. Mat takes it and reads through his conversation, and then raises one eyebrow at Tito, handing it back. “What?”

“Stop texting him,” Mat says, and Tito groans, rolling back onto his stomach and taking the ice cream from Mat’s lap. “What, am I wrong?”

“No, it’s just logical,” Tito says, shoving a huge bite of ice cream into his mouth. He immediately makes a face, swallowing. “Fuck, brain freeze. Ow.”

“Hey,” Mat says, and when Tito doesn’t move, he takes the almost empty ice cream from him and sets it on the table between their beds. He leans in. “ _Hey._ ”

Tito looks up. “What?”

Mat kisses him, and Tito sits up, placing a leg between both of Mat’s as he kisses him back. Mat pulls away, cupping Tito’s cheek. “Okay?”

“Yeah,” Tito says, breathless. He kisses Mat again, and they kind of just kiss for a while. Mat’s mind wanders a bit, only coming back when Tito pulls back. “Hey.”

“Hey back,” Mat says. Tito tucks a strand of hair behind Mat’s ear. “What’s up?”

“Can I blow you?” Tito asks, and Mat nods, saying yes. Tito smiles at him and pulls his pants down, and Mat isn’t going to complain about getting blow jobs every time Tito’s upset, it’s just.

He sort of feels like he’s taking advantage of Tito. He’s not, to be clear. They’re both consenting, and it’s not Mat’s fault that he caught feelings, and he really isn’t trying to do anything with those feelings at all. All he wants is for Tito to be happy, and if Tito’s happy blowing him and fucking him and kissing him and nothing else, well, Mat won’t complain. Tito being happy is the most important thing, here.

By the time Mat comes, Tito’s given him the best blow job he’s ever received, _again_ , and that thought simultaneously makes him really happy, and really fucks him. Like, he’s getting a blow job from the love of his life, but the love of his life got so good at them by practicing with his ex that really fucked him up. Unrelated, Mat’s really gotta quit it with the “love of his life” talk. Tito goes and brushes his teeth and comes back and kisses Mat before getting up to plug his phone in.

“You taste like chocolate,” he says, and Mat laughs.

“Thanks,” Mat says, instead of “I love you.” Tito looks at him and smiles, a real smile, the one that makes his eyes crinkle and he bites his bottom lip, turning back to type a text out, and it’s such an intimate moment that Mat entertains the thought of telling Tito.

He doesn’t, though, because Tito deserves better than that.

  
  


The season comes and goes, too quickly for anyone’s liking, and it’s summer. Mat’s packing his suitcase in the Seidenberg’s basement when someone knocks at his door.

“Hey,” Tito says. “Can I come in?”

“‘Course,” Mat says. Tito sits on the bed, lays back. “When do you leave?”

“Tuesday,” he says. He sits up suddenly, and Mat looks at him. “What are you doing for your birthday?”

“Uh, I think I’m going to LA with some of my buddies,” Mat says. Tito nods. “You?”

“I don’t know,” Tito says, shrugging. “I just–”

“Can I…” Mat trails off, but Tito looks at him, and his face is so earnest that Mat blurts it out. “Can I come visit you? Or do you have like, set plans–”

“I told you I didn’t,” Tito says, not unkindly. He’s smiling. Mat nods, puts a shirt in his suitcase. “Come to Montreal for a week. It’ll be fun.”

“Okay,” Mat says. “I’ll book the tickets when I get home tomorrow.”

“What are you doing with your car?” Tito asks, and Mat shrugs.

“Leaving it at John’s place,” he says. “Can you hand me that t-shirt?”

Tito does, and Mat folds it, putting it in the suitcase. Tito comes and sits next to him. “I’m gonna miss you.”

“Come to BC,” Mat says suddenly. “Not like, now or anything, but at some point. My parents would love to see you.”

“I...when?” Tito asks, unlocking his phone and searching through his calendar. “July?”

“Works for me,” Mat says. “I’m gonna miss you, too.”

It’s as close to “I love you,” as he’ll get, for now.

  
  
  


Mat turns 21, then Tito turns 21, and Mat has lots of fun in Montreal (he does not “romantically kiss” Tito like Dante tells him to), and then its July, and suddenly Mat is picking Tito up from the airport.

“Hey, man,” he says, pulling Tito into a hug. He smells like sunscreen. He tells Tito this, who laughs.

“Didn’t know how sunny it was gonna be,” Tito says. He’s wearing sunglasses, and he looks tan, like he’s been outside a lot. “You look happy.”

“Happy to finally show you my city, prove how much better it is,” Mat says. Tito rolls his eyes. “Come on. Is that all you brought?”

“Oh, no,” Tito says, and when he steps out of the way, his big suitcase is behind him. “I didn’t...really book a return ticket yet. Figured I might go see my brother and his girlfriend at some point.”

“That’s okay,” Mat says quickly. “Like, honestly. You can stay as long as you want.” Tito smiles at that.

“Tell me about your summer?” he asks, and Mat starts talking, and he keeps talking, and he watches Tito’s reactions and thinks, “I love you.” It’s easier to think it than to say it.

The drive is quieter, with Tito almost falling asleep because of how long his plane ride was, and Mat turning the music down so Tito can rest. He’s watching the road, but he thinks about how much Tito must trust him, to be able to fall asleep in his car, because Tito doesn’t trust most drivers as far as he can throw them, and that makes Mat’s heart flutter, and he resolutely ignores it as best as he can.

He parks as his sister pulls out of the driveway, and she waves at them both. Tito blinks sleepily and waves, smiling at her, and Mat’s heart clenches. He takes Tito’s backpack inside, and Tito’s hugging Mat’s mom, asking her about how she’s doing, and shaking Mat’s dad’s hand. Mat is suddenly struck by how much this is like bringing a boyfriend home.

Later, while Tito’s sleeping in Mat’s bed (which maybe Mat’s thoughts are running wild with that, but he didn’t ask for this, honestly, it’s not his fault neither of them can set up an air mattress), he heads downstairs.

“Hey,” he says to his sister, who’s sitting at the kitchen table, fucking around on her phone.

“Hi,” she says. “Tito’s here.”

“He is,” Mat confirms. “You knew he was coming.” He takes the pitcher out of the fridge, and fills his water bottle. He takes a sip.

“So when are you going to tell Mom and Dad you’re dating him?” Liana asks, and Mat spits out his water everywhere, just as his dad walks in.

“Woah,” his dad says, and when Mat turns to Liana to glare at her, she looks as innocent as possible. “You and Tito are together?”

“No, we aren’t,” Mat says, and his sister and his dad both give him identical looks of confusion.

“Hold on,” Liana says, as his dad says, “Wait.” Mat looks at them and takes another sip of his water. Liana wins out. “You’re fucking with me.”

“Language,” his dad says. “But you’re fucking with me.”

“Language!” Liana parrots, and Mat rolls his eyes at them both.

“No, guys, I’m not fucking with you. Do not ‘language’ me,” he says, and both of them shut their mouths. “Seriously, though. He’s just my buddy.”

“Bullshit,” Liana says, and his dad doesn’t even say anything this time. “You do not look at him like he’s ‘just your buddy,’ also, I know you’ve kissed him before.”

“We were fifteen!” Mat argues. He looks to his dad for help, and his dad shrugs. “Dad, come on.”

“Nope, no way, I’ve learned not to get in the middle of you two,” he says, walking away. “I just want you to be happy, bud.”

“Same,” Liana says, and Mat rolls his eyes. He sits at the table and looks at her. “Seriously, dude. What’s the worst that could happen?”

“He immediately ends our friendship and never speaks to me again,” Mat says automatically, and Liana just blinks. “I’ve thought about this a lot.”

“Clearly,” she says.

“No, it’s just–” he cuts himself off, and he’s glad he does, because Tito chooses that moment to walk in. Mat looks at him, and he’s so sleep-rumpled and soft that his stomach does a literal flip flop. “Hey, sleepy.”

“Christ,” Liana whispers.

“Hi,” Tito says, sitting in between them. “Hey, Liana. How are you?”

“Good,” she says, smiling. “Glad you could come visit.” And one of the things that Mat loves most about his sister is that as much as she gets on his case and teases him, she’s a real one when it comes to keeping his secrets. Who needs a Dylan Strome or Dante Fabbro when he’s got his sister? He texts this to them, only to receive two middle finger emojis in response.

“Me too,” Tito says, impossibly genuine. It takes Mat’s breath away. Liana picks up her empty plate and stands, putting it in the dishwasher.

“When do you leave?” she asks, and Mat gets up to bring her her glass.

“I’m not sure,” Tito says, and they both pause.

“He’s not sure?” she mouths at him. Mat shrugs.

“I didn’t book a return ticket yet?” Tito says, timid. “Thought maybe I could visit my brother and his girlfriend, or something, I don’t know.”

“You’re welcome here as long as you like, you know,” she says, and she gives Mat a pointed look, mouthing, “We’ll talk later.” She gives Tito a side hug. “I’ve missed you. You always roast Mat the best.”

Tito laughs, loud and bright, at her comment and it makes Mat smile. It feels dopey on his face, and Liana just shakes her head, leaving the room. Mat wraps his arms around Tito, wrists interlocking over Tito’s chest.

“Wanna watch Netflix?” he asks, and Tito visibly relaxes.

“I’m glad you didn’t try to sell me on Vancouver today,” he says.

Mat laughs. “No, that’s for the rest of the time you’re here,” he says. “Come on, we can probably binge the second season of “Stranger Things” before tomorrow.”

“Popcorn?” Tito asks, and then goes to make it, and he knows his way around Mat’s kitchen even though he’s only ever been there once before, and Mat’s heart clenches again. He’s gotta get ahold of himself.

  
  


(By the time Tito’s been there for three weeks, they’ve fucked pretty much every night, in Mat’s childhood bed, and also in the shower, and also exchanged handjobs in the hammock in the backyard more than once, and Mat kind of feels like he’s living his dream. He and Tito are lazily making out in said hammock when his mouth just almost says “I love you” without even thinking. He has to pull away and kiss Tito’s forehead instead.

“You okay?” Tito asks.

He just kisses Tito more fervently, and Tito responds in kind, so it’s not entirely a wash.)

  
  


So, really, it shouldn’t be a surprise that it comes to a head when it does. Like all mild relationship horror stories, this one starts with a family dinner.

“So, Anthony,” his mom starts, and Mat and Liana lock eyes. “How’s your summer been?” They both let out a breath they were holding, and Tito looks between them, chuckling a little.

“Uh, it’s been nice,” he says. “Glad I could come visit.”

“It was nice of you to come,” Mat’s dad says. Liana’s head snaps toward him. “I know Mat was really looking forward to it.” Mat blushes a bright red at that.

“Can confirm,” Liana says, winking at TIto. “Anyway, Dad, this salad is great.”

“Thanks, honey,” Mat’s dad says, impossibly touched.

“Anthony, how long have you and Mat–”

“Oh, _shit,_ ” Liana says, spilling her red wine all over the floor. She slaps her hands over her mouth, dramatic. “I mean, shoot.”

“ _Language_ , Liana,” her mom says, and Mat’s heart is pounding. He puts a hand over it to will his heartbeat to slow down.

“Sorry, nervous thing,” she says to explain away her weird behavior, and Mat snorts. His mom gives her a look. Tito squeezes his hand under the table.

“Mom,” Mat starts. “I was just wondering–”

“Mat, sweetheart, I see you all the time,” his mom says, not unkindly. Mat purses his lips.

“Yeah, Mat, maybe she wants to talk to me,” Tito jokes, elbowing him in the ribs.

“I do, in fact,” she says, smiling, and Mat looks at Liana, and Liana shrugs helplessly. “I was just wondering how long–”

“He’d be staying? Great question,” Liana interrupts. “I actually already asked him, but I’m sure he’d love to tell you.”

“I was actually going to ask, before I was so rudely interrupted, multiple times, how long you and Mat had been together,” his mom says, and Mat knocks his glass of water off the table.

"Oh," Liana says, weakly.

“Um, probably about four months?” Tito answers, kicking at Mat’s ankle. It’s his way of saying “We’ll talk later.” Mat is well-versed in Tito speak. “It’s been nice.”

“Well, it’s just sweet to see you both so happy,” she says, smiling at both of them. She somehow leaves no room for argument, and they both nod. She goes back to cutting her chicken, and Liana looks at Mat as if to say she’s sorry, and Mat feels like his head is going to explode.

“Can I be excused?” he asks, after sitting in agony for five minutes. “My stomach hurts.” He takes his plate and sets it next to the sink in the kitchen, bracing himself on the counter. He takes several deep breaths, but none of them get enough air into his lungs.

“Yeah, I’ll go check on him,” he hears Tito say.

“Actually, I got it,” Liana says, and Mat has _never_ been so grateful for her. He waits for her in the kitchen and they step outside to sit on the back patio, feet dangling.

“Thanks,” he says, and his voice cracks.

“You’re not gonna cry, are you?” Liana asks. She looks alarmed, but reaches out to hold his hand.

“Eh, probably not,” he says, but it’s a little wobbly. She ignores it and they stare at the hockey net. “It...I was pretty obvious, anyway.”

“Yeah, fucking every night was pretty obvious,” she says, and he shoves at her halfheartedly. She laughs a little. “I’m sorry, though. Just. Take your time.” She gives his hand one last squeeze and she goes back inside. Dinner’s pretty much over by that time, and Mat fully expects that Tito is going to come through that door and chew him out for at least blindsiding him, here, but twenty minutes go by, and then twenty more minutes, and the sun is setting.

“Hey,” he hears, and it startles him out of his stupor. Tito touches his shoulder as he sits down. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.”

“It’s okay,” Mat says. “Sorry, I really blindsided you. Thanks for, um, covering for me, I guess.”

“It’s what friends do,” Tito says, and there’s the kicker. Mat bites his lip, repeating over and over in his head that he will _not_ cry. He stares straight ahead. The sky is almost a pastel pink and orange.

It’s quiet for another moment, and Mat doesn’t know what comes over him when he says, “I’m in love with you, if that wasn’t clear. Since I guess it was to, um. Everyone but you.”

“Oh,” Tito says, and Mat hugs his knees to his chest and tucks his face in. He feels a light press of something to his shoulder, and when he turns his head, Tito’s leaning on him. “Hey, Mat.”

“Hey,” Mat says, hiding his face. Tito nudges him with his foot. “What?”

“I’m in love with you, too,” he says, and Mat shoots up so fast he thinks he might have given himself whiplash. Tito chuckles. “Don’t look so shocked. I literally didn’t book a return ticket so I could spend more time with you.”

“I thought…” Mat trails off, and Tito shakes his head.

“I talked to Liana,” he said. “Not like, before, just tonight. She said you were pretty convinced you’d fucked us up.”

“Well, to be fair, I didn’t know you were in love with me, because you just got out of a relationship,” Mat says. “Also, I caught feelings before we started fucking. I’m sorry.”

Tito frowns. “I got out of a relationship in _February,_ that was so long ago. Also, did you think I was going to date you immediately?”

“So you see my point!” Mat exclaims. “I was content with whatever, honestly. I didn’t want you to think that I was like. Trying to hurt you. I didn’t mean to catch feelings.”

“That isn’t that recent, Barz. And I know you, you’d never hurt me. We’re fine.” Tito scoots closer and leans his head on Mat’s shoulder. He kisses Mat’s cheek. “This sunset is nice.”

“It is,” Mat says, pressing a kiss to the top of Tito’s head. He takes a deep breath. “Nicer that I can share it with you, eh?”

“Oh my god,” Tito says. “You’re such a sap.”

“I could be extra sappy and sing you some Biebs right now.” Tito laughs at that, and Mat feels warmth settling all over his body, even though the night is cooling off considerably. “I won’t, though, because I don’t want to make this moment more sappy.”

“Or ruin it,” Tito says, and Mat starts to pull back, pretending to be offended, but Tito catches him in a kiss.

It’s not electric or wild or frightening, it’s just...quiet, like kissing Tito is what he’s meant to be doing, always. All the thoughts running around his head fade away, until it’s just _Tito, Tito, Tito_.

When he pulls back, he’s cupping Tito’s face, stroking his thumb across Tito’s cheekbone, and he says, “I love you.”

Tito smiles. “I love you, too.”

//

Like all stories with happy endings, this one ends with Mat laying on a bed, in an apartment in New York City, scrolling through his phone, and someone, Tito, flopping next to him.

“Hey, roomie,” he says. He snuggles into Mat’s chest. “Roomie, hey. Pay attention to me.”

“Hey, boyfriend,” Mat says, rolling his eyes. He locks his phone, though, kissing Tito once, twice. “What do you want?”

“You,” Tito says. “I missed you.”

“Unreal,” Mat says, laughing. “You saw me three weeks ago.”

“Three weeks is a long time to go without seeing your boyfriend who you see every day,” Tito points out, kissing him again. Mat laughs into it. “ _Mat_.”

“ _Anthony_.” He rolls over. “I’m tired. Let's just lay here?”

“Okay,” Tito agrees, and he lays his head on Mat’s chest. “I’m happy you’re here."

“Me too,” Mat says. And, like.

If someone had told little old pining Mat back in December that he’d have this by the start of next season, he’d have told them they were crazy. If someone had told him in April he’d have this, he’d have laughed in their face. But here he is, and his favorite person in the whole world is lying on his chest, and it’s quiet. He supposes things have a funny way of working out.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> a character is worried he's taking advantage of another character by having (equally consenting) sex with him because he caught feelings. there is a slight discussion of this, but it is ultimately determined by both characters that because there was no expectation of a relationship that it was fine.
> 
> untagged characters include Dante Fabbro, the Barzal family, Alan Quine, Jordan Eberle, and Dennis Seidenberg.
> 
> catch me on twitter @adamsparirsh for more rarepair shenanigans.


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